Wednesday, November 28, 2012

The Beginning of Fatherhood!

So its been 16 weeks since i found out that i am gonna be a dad, and i can tell you this, its a life changing event. I have been shit scared some days, thinking i wont be the parent that i should be. I also have been so worried i might fail as a provider or father. But then i realize, that i am still here and i am still excited to meet my lil one, and even though i havent met this little being i have never felt this much love before. And i know i would do ANYTHING for him\her, hell i would die gladly protecting my baby. I keep imagining the first time i get to see the baby, and how he\she will react to me.
I have been reading every book i can lay my hands on about babies and pregnancy, my wife rolls her eyes, she thinks i am a nerd and slightly obsessed, maybe i am. Cause all i can think about is makinng sure my child has everything i never had, and all the oppurtunities available. I fear i might spoil the lil tiger hahahaha but hey, thats what dads do best right?
We get to finally see the sex of the baby, in 7 days, i have done all the old wives tales and i believe i already know, but thats my secret hehe. Either way though a healthy child is all i can really hope for. I have so much to teach and tell em.
I never knew that something so small could make me feel so big and strong, but so scared and fragile. I have to say, i give women a whole new found respect, they go through this amazing yet extremely hard event for 9 months. The sacrifice and dedication is unimaginable. I actually envy my wife sometimes, she has a bond with my baby i will never truly have or understand. Lucky!
So everynight i talk to her\him, sing too, even though i have been told my voice is a secret weapon of mass destruction. But ii am sure my baby loves it just the way it is. Last night i spent maybe 30 mins just listening to his\her heartbeat, whilst we fell asleep, i still cant believe that i made that, thats my baby!

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